Some people are hard to get along with, consistently miserable, and just plain mean. In my worst moments I’d call them (or myself, when I fit this depiction) jerks. Boy, we could use a lot more nice people, people who say hello to you, who hold the door, who show genuine interest in others, who do the right thing. Some days, it appears the good guys are hiding. Someone called for a gathering of kind individuals, and I wasn’t invited. So, I’m stuck with the unkind and, I suppose, I’m one of them. Though I exaggerate to some degree, it is certainly refreshing to meet people who are just plain nice.
On the other hand, we probably shouldn’t be too quick to commend every person who wears a smile or speaks cordially. Sometimes, in fact, the very people who initially look and sound so impressive are the worst kind of jerks. I mean, some “kind and gentle” neighbors end up flying airplanes into buildings. Other “nice guys” end up making the evening news as perverts. Indeed, sometimes the worst culprits are the very ones who make the grand claims about morality and religiosity. Let’s not confuse an attractive outward demeanor with genuine niceness. Lots of jerks masquerade as the upholders of righteousness. Whatever your smile frequency, however many times you’ve been cordial, none of these makes up for a mean-spirit, a flawed sense of ethics, or an obvious lack of personal authenticity.
So, there you have my rant on niceness. I’m all in favor of being nice, good, kind, cordial, and the like. Lord, save us from an uncaring mean-spirited attitude. On the other hand, keep those plastic smiles away from me, too. Disingenuous people-pleasing is not what I'm after in anyone, including myself. Okay, then, what am I seeking? Hmm. I guess, I’m looking for people who are both nice and real. Niceness plus authenticity, niceness plus a willingness to by-pass the cordial when a situation demands it, niceness plus an commitment to speaking the truth even when it hurts, niceness plus boldness, niceness plus an appropriate emotional fervor, niceness plus all that is sacred and right. That’s it! I’m searching for (and praying for) niceness-plus!
On the other hand, we probably shouldn’t be too quick to commend every person who wears a smile or speaks cordially. Sometimes, in fact, the very people who initially look and sound so impressive are the worst kind of jerks. I mean, some “kind and gentle” neighbors end up flying airplanes into buildings. Other “nice guys” end up making the evening news as perverts. Indeed, sometimes the worst culprits are the very ones who make the grand claims about morality and religiosity. Let’s not confuse an attractive outward demeanor with genuine niceness. Lots of jerks masquerade as the upholders of righteousness. Whatever your smile frequency, however many times you’ve been cordial, none of these makes up for a mean-spirit, a flawed sense of ethics, or an obvious lack of personal authenticity.
So, there you have my rant on niceness. I’m all in favor of being nice, good, kind, cordial, and the like. Lord, save us from an uncaring mean-spirited attitude. On the other hand, keep those plastic smiles away from me, too. Disingenuous people-pleasing is not what I'm after in anyone, including myself. Okay, then, what am I seeking? Hmm. I guess, I’m looking for people who are both nice and real. Niceness plus authenticity, niceness plus a willingness to by-pass the cordial when a situation demands it, niceness plus an commitment to speaking the truth even when it hurts, niceness plus boldness, niceness plus an appropriate emotional fervor, niceness plus all that is sacred and right. That’s it! I’m searching for (and praying for) niceness-plus!
1 comment:
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